Friday, September 13, 2013

John Joseph Thornton. June 5, 1959 - May 7, 2014

 It gives me great pain to say that my dearest friend, life partner and husband, John passed away on Wednesday of this week in the early hours of the morning, at about 1:37.
He was more than ready to go; tired of all the pain and having to be jostled around in his bed without a single spot on him that did not hurt.
Hospice had provided the liquid forms of his medicines so that when he could no longer swallow, he was able to get the pain taken care of in his last day. 
It was obvious, on the night of the 5th, that the end was nearing.  His last day was difficult for him as his linens had to be changed over and over again.  When the 6th dawned, I called his sister and had her contact her two brothers, hoping that they would have one last chance for all of them to be together.  They were all there by evening.  John saw each of them as they arrived. 
Sis told me that I really needed a nap in the early evening.  When I awoke from my nap, it was plain that John had slipped into a semi coma. 
The last few hours were very difficult for all in the room, but as I promised him, the drugs were enough so that he was not present for the difficulties that he would normally have faced at the end.  My sister was busy till the end administering Morphine and Methadone when I could not.  She and John had become very close in the week or so since she arrived to help us out.
Michael Thornton told stories of his youth with John, and we all talked about his favorite things as I lay beside him and told him that he should just sleep and feel better when he woke.  He passed very suddenly so that the change was barely perceptible for a few moments.  We are all so very grateful that he is gone and the pain is no longer grasping him and filling his every waking moment. 
There will be no funeral.  No viewings etc.  John wanted his remains to be cremated. 
We found a very beautiful urn...I had planned to find one in an antique shop...but they happened to have the perfect one at the funeral home.  My sister and I both fell in love with it immediately.
His ashes should be back here no later than Monday sometime.  At that time I will decide if there will be some sort of gathering.  He especially loved English style afternoon teas, the more formal the better.  That is a possibility.  Others are free to do any type of memorial they wish for themselves. 
If anyone wants to do a donation, I would like to see something done for deaf choose.  Any documentation you want to send as a result of the donation can be placed into the urn with him until Harry and I join him in it. Room for two and a half!

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